Unbuffered Connections

Community is important.

I am now on the other side of my first summer of doing this guiding and leading work full-time. It was a full summer, so now I can take a moment and breathe and reflect. One of the nice surprises that I noticed from the trips I led this summer is how quickly individuals formed a community. People who did not know each other at all or who knew each other a little quickly became a nomadic family unit looking out for each other, caring for each other, and sharing with each other. I was happily surprised how each night when discussing the question for the day (what are you carrying, what weighs you down, what do you need, etc.) people shared freely and openly without much hesitation. Maybe it was because we cooked for each other, gathered water, explored, and shared some very intimate moments together that people were so willing to share. I was glad to notice that no matter how long the trip was, people would openly and willingly share. From day-hikes to multi-day trips, a deep and profound community was formed on each trip.

This makes me wonder why. Why was it that people were willing to share their vulnerabilities – i.e. what they are worried about or scared about. Why were people willing to show their weaknesses and to lean on others that they did not know at all? Why were we open to cook and eat together and have conversations that went beyond the surface topics and the banal banter? Perhaps it was the shared experience of being in the wilderness together, struggling and suffering together. We sleep and eat together, and share so many of the bodily functions. It does not matter what kind of living situation you came from, we are all going to poop and pee in the same (or similar) place. We are all sleeping in similar circumstances. Perhaps it is that the wilderness experience is a great leveler that helped to create bonds of community and intimacy. Perhaps it was sharing the grand moments of views and vistas as well as the very mundane moments and those of mud and bugs together that brought people together.

There is most likely a truth to all of these ponderings, but I also think there is something deeper.

We yearn and long to be in community.

I don’t mean the community that is surface and safe, but the community where you are seen and where you see others. I mean the community where you are willing to take extra weight if someone is struggling, where you are willing to stand in mud and water for the sake of someone else’s safety. I mean the community where relationships are strong and trust is a bedrock. We yearn for that kind of community. We need that kind of community.

When I started this work, it was in part because I believe very strongly that people need to get into the wilderness. We have lost a connection with ourselves that is important and life-giving. We have buffered ourselves from our own sense of place, experience, and desires (see Charles Taylor, A Secular Age for more on the “buffered self”). But what I have found is that it is not just about the individual. The desire to really connect with ourselves is also a desire to connect with others. This desire is an awareness that community is needed and is important. There is a way in which the relationships are also “unbuffered,” raw and real because of our presence in the wilderness. We need this community, this raw and wild relationship with each other.

Let’s think about the communities that we already have in the “front-country.” I have spent a lot of time working with other organizations. I have pastored churches, worked at camps, with boards, and with various other groups and have found that all, in their own way, are communities (thanks for the obvious statement!). But in forming relationships something seems to get in the way again and again. We become hesitant, we hold back, we want to make sure we can trust each other, and we are careful in joining and becoming a part of a community. It is different in the wilderness. In the wilderness, we do not have time for such caution and care because who knows what might be lurking behind the trees or what might be hiding under that rock. I would be so bold as to suggest that if an organization is looking to foster community that time in the wilderness would be well spent. We get away from the trappings of buildings, of labels, of office, and return to a place that is unbuffered, that is open, and that allows us to fully experience each other. And it doesn’t take long. Three days and two nights creates a community. One long and challenging hike creates community. A shared moment watching a sunset or walking through the rain creates community. And those relationships can then find their way back to the organization with the reality that you have been seen. We have moment of true connection that is not restricted by technology and structures. For a moment, your community can connect with who and what it perhaps desires to be.

Community is important. It is essential. In the wilderness, the backcountry we can find relationships that are truly transcendent and powerful. I am now led to think about my desire for solo hikes and how that may go against all that I am suggesting, but that may be a different post. For now, find a friend, find a bunch, and go into the wilderness together!